Carolyn Burke STL Blog

Marriage may simply be about celebrating a milestone: recognizing the relationship that a couple has built together and the love that they share for each other. But weddings are also very future-oriented, as the couple publicly promises to maintain their relationship for life.  Marriage vows – the solemn promises that the newlyweds make to each other in front of their closest friends and family – are why weddings have such an emotional impact. If these promises are the essence of what it means to be married, then what exactly do you want to promise each other? You could always go with the traditional marriage vows: for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, for better for worse…but, these seemed a bit too vague for our tastes. Below are the ten promises taken from www.ScienceOfRelationships.com Each of these promises is going to help achieve long-term marital bliss (we hope). 1.  I promise to respect, admire and appreciate you for who you are, as well as for the...

Most couples feel that their wedding vows are the most important part of the service.  As the Wedding Officiant, I let my couples choose vows from a list I provide, they can mix and match the words, or they can recite their own vows.  The list I provide has nine choices. As I looked back at last year's ceremonies, I tallied which ones were the most popular. There is no surprise that the number one choice is the most traditional. First Place I, [ Name ], take you, [ Name ],  To be my wedded [wife/husband/partner]. To have and to hold,  From this day forward, For better or worse,  For richer or poorer,  In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish, Till death do us part. Second Place [ Name ], I want you to be my [wife/husband/partner], and my one true love.  I will trust you and honor you.  I will laugh with you and cry with you.  Through the best and the worst, Through the difficult and the easy.  What may com...

Here are a few unconventional ceremony ideas to take you down the aisle with a twist. 1. Let your guests mingle over cocktails before the ceremony. 2. The couple greets the guests as they arrive at the ceremony site. 3. Face the guests when you recite your wedding vows. 4. Have your guests sit or stand in a circle around you during the ceremony. Ceremony in the Round 5. Have both parents walk you down the aisle. Dad - Bride - Mom 6. Have your husband-to-be escort you to the altar. 7. Don’t have bridesmaids or groomsmen - just the two of you. 8. Have an uneven number of attendants.     (Maybe you just want a maid of honor, but he wants three groomsmen.) 9. Have a “man of honor” instead of a maid of honor. (Your brother? A good male friend?) 10. Have the groom choose a “best woman.” (His sister? A good female friend?) 11. Don’t wear a veil. 12. Have bridesmaids carry candles instead of bouquets as they walk down the aisle. Bridesmaids H...

The key elements utilized in most Western wedding ceremonies, in the most common order are: Introduction - Opening Words - Invocation Main Body : Interrogation, Presentation Question of Intent Vows Exchange of Rings Closing - Announcement of the Couple The key elements utilized in most Western wedding ceremonies, in their most common order are: Introduction, Opening, or Invocation -- The officiant typically announces the purpose of the gathering, indicates the names of the bride and groom, welcomes the guests and solicits them to participate in the ceremony by their presence and, perhaps, by their prayers. Main Body -- The officiant reflects on the meaning of marriage and the significance of the bride and groom's decision to join together in wedlock.  The officiant may also share more casual remarks about the bride and groom as he or she has come to know them, and about the fitness of their union.  This portion of the ceremony might also include religi...

What is a Renewal of Vows Ceremony? A renewal of vows ceremony is both a reaffirmation and renewal. Couples are deciding to renew their vows more often than in the past. You are celebrating the blessings of being in love and staying together. There are many reasons for you to renew your wedding vows.  Perhaps you eloped, or were united in the courthouse by a justice of the peace.  Now you want a REAL ceremony. Some couples renew their vows to coincide with other special life events like the birth of a child, the recovery of a serious illness, or landmark wedding anniversaries. Sometimes, the renewal is a time to acknowledge the victory of reuniting after a time of separation.  They can be the setting of a family reunion. Renewal of Marriage Ceremonies may contain the following sections: Introduction and Welcome Acknowledgement of Children of the Marriage Reading Renewal of Vows Re-Dedication of Rings Words from Previous Wedding Guests Closing Words It is a...

Step 1. Read vow examples for inspiration. Start by reading traditional, by-the-book vows to see what strikes a chord with you. You can incorporate these into the original words you write, or just use them as a jumping-off point for your personalized vows. Once you've found a few you love, consider what it is about the style that draws you to those vows in particular. Step 2. Agree on format and tone with your future spouse. Decide how you want your vows to come across. Will they be humorous? Poetic and romantic? Go over the logistics too. Will you write them separately or together? Will they be completely different or will you make the same promises to each other, as you would with traditional vows? Some couples do a little of each. Finally, will you share them with each other or keep them a secret until the wedding day? Step 3. Jot down notes about your relationship. Take some time to reflect on your fiancé. Think about how you felt when you first met, what made you fa...

A sweet young couple reserved my date and time for a May Day wedding.  The ceremony occurred at the Music Stand at Tower Grove Park in St Louis MO.  They chose to recite their owns vows.  When I arrived at the ceremony, I ask to place the vows in my folder and hand it to them when the time comes to recite them.  The groom works as a Cook at a Diner in St Louis. The vows they wrote to each other were sweet and enduring.  But what makes these vows memorable were that they were written on a few Guest Checks from the diner. Although the couple were quite young. They seemed mature and sure of themselves. They had memorized their vows and really did not seem to need them. Very sweet indeed - Congratulations to Audrey and Daniel !!

I performed two weddings on the same day where the groom started to cry when he started his vows to his new wife. The guests at both weddings reacted in a similar way - between taking your own breath away and a giggle. The first wedding was booked less than seven days, and I do not let the couples know how the ceremony will be written. It works well for elopements and they usually don't care or it doesn't matter. They trust me. Barb and Jim had their ceremony in their home with just close friends and family. They were having cake and punch afterwards. The second wedding was able to customize most of the ceremony as long as I still get to keep the Opening Words and Closing with Announcement the same. Marianne and Brian picked their own Question of Intent, the part where I asked if they take each other as husband and wife. You know, the "I Do" part. They found something from another officiant's website. This is fine with me. The vows can also be written by t...

Here is a sample of a lovely wedding vow to make to a couple who want to include children. "(Names), as we face the future together as a family, I promise to stand by your side, To share and support both of your hopes, dreams and goals. When either of you fall, I will catch you. When either of you cry, I will comfort you. When you laugh, I will share your joy. Everything I am and everything I have is for both of you. From this moment forth, I choose to share my life with you and our beautiful [children/daughter/son]."   Here is another favorite of mine....   "I (.....), choose you,(......), and (.........), to be my family. I promise to honour and respect you, And to provide for you To the best of my ability. I promise to make our home a haven, Where trust, love, and laughter are abundant. I make these promises lovingly, and freely, And vow to honour them all the days of my life."

The key elements utilized in most Western wedding ceremonies, in their most common order are: Introduction - Opening Words - Invocation Main Body : Interrogation, Presentation Question of Intent Vows Exchange of Rings Closing - Announcement of the Couple The key elements utilized in most Western wedding ceremonies, in their most common order are: Introduction, Opening, or Invocation -- The officiant typically announces the purpose of the gathering, indicates the names of the bride and groom, welcomes the guests and solicits them to participate in the ceremony by their presence and, perhaps, by their prayers. Main Body -- The officiant reflects on the meaning of marriage and the significance of the bride and groom's decision to join together in wedlock.  The officiant may also share more casual remarks about the bride and groom as he or she has come to know them, and about the fitness of their union.  This portion of the ceremony might also include reli...

A sweet young couple reserved my date and time back in February for a May Day wedding.  The ceremony occurred at the Music Stand at Tower Grove Park in St Louis MO.  They chose to recite their owns vows.  When I arrive at the ceremony, I asked to have the vows to put in my folder and hand it to them when the time comes to recite them.  Daniel works as a Cook at the Courtesy Diner in Dogtown. The vows they wrote to each other were sweet and enduring.  But what makes them memorable were that they were written on a few Guest Checks or restaurant order forms. Although the couple were quite young. They seemed mature and sure of themselves. They had memorized their vows and really did not seem to need them. Very sweet indeed - Congratulations to Audrey and Daniel !!